Happy Chanukah

Hellenists vs. Judealists
We are few
But our voices are loud.
And because we are still detirmined to find that small flask of truth hidden somwhere within this incomplete world, because we WILL find it, and then light it with our souls, G-d will make an open miracle and allow that flame to last; not for one day, but for 8!
May G-d allow us to take Chanuka's message and passion into the rest of our lives!
Happy Chanuka

-Max

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Hi again

Just a short note
Sorry I seem to disappear form time to time. Well, I don't really actually disappear, I'm here. It's actually harder to write my thoughts than I thought it would be. Oh, well. So ......
I'm going to work in about 20 minutes. I'm starting to learn the ropes there a bit. But everyday is completely different. It depends on everyone's moods. Yesterday, everyone seemed to be extra hyper. Maybe the teachers stuck something into their drinks or something. I sort of doubt that actually.

I am also working doing a sort of secretary type job and learning how to do that. Thank G-d, I'm busy. Ironically, (but not unexpected), I think I'm learning a LOT more this year (living at home and working 2 jobs) than when I was living out of town and going to school as a student. Learning about the world, and learning about myself. I know this all sounds very vague and I hope to go into more detail in the coming blogs (soon hopefully).

So much to talk about :-)

-Max

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Hi, I'm back after quite a long absence. I was sick for a while. Thank G-d, I'm back and doing much better. Well, today is my first day of my new job- after care program for 4-7 year old kids from 1:00-6:00. This should be quite a new experience. In more ways than one. Maybe they (the kids) will teach me how to chill some more. Being intense and deep has its place and time, but I need more of a balance. For my own sake. One main thing that hopefully I will learn from them is not to beat myself up so much. That's one thing that little kids don't usually do so often. You don't see too many 5 and 6 year olds spending their time being hard on themselves. They don't over-think things either. Maybe I can pick up some things from them. Maybe appreciate simplicity some more. That would be great.
I'm a bit nervous though. Nervous for the challenges that come with the job. The challenges that lie ahead. I'm Scared to begin the new year- scared of the unknown. Should I be? No. But I am. It's natural I guess. Tells me I need to work on my bitachon. I have A LOT to work on don't I? Yep. But I can't do everything at once. S0 what do I choose? Hmmmm.........
Of everything I need to work on, I think I'll choose to work on giving myself credit for everything I do and all the effort I use towards things. I will try to acknowledge even and ESPECIALLY the things that may be easy for most people but are hard for me. I don't exactly know how to do that without feeling fake. So if any of you have any suggestions, I would love to hear them.
Looking forward
-Max

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Where on earth am I?

I haven't written much these days because I've been so detatched from myself that I even wonder where I've gone. I'm still detatched now but now at least I'm attatched enough to realize that I'm not attatched at ALL.
Where on earth have I gone?
I kinda miss me..
Or do I?
I miss SOMETHING...but I dont know what that something is.
Let me tell you, it's really great feeling in the dark and oblivious to your own self.
It's almost as fun as an ice cream cone (except without the ice cream..and without the cone, for that matter)
And I am so sick of what tries to be chizuk but what sounds like such a cliche. Uch...Don't like cliches. They are so fake. Fake rhymes with rake. And bake. And steak. Why am I thinking about food. I'm not hungry are you?
I really hope that G-d will give me clarity. and soon.
I am so sick of so much!!!

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Hi!
Sorry I disappeared for a while. It was not intentional.
It's also NOT because I had nothing to write. On the contrary, I probably had TOO much to write. There's this thing in my brain that when so many ideas come into it, I have a hard time deciding which one (out of the million) to choose to keep. So many thoughts. So many images. So many songs. So many people. So many books. If my brain could scream, it probably would. Ah, but what would it say?
AHA!! The QUESTION OF THE DAY IS:

If your brain could scream, what would it say?

(and why would it be screaming?...I know, I know...that's two questions. But you can handle it. I have great faith in you.)

My gosh, why does all the new music coming out sound like it's from the 80's?? It's kinda bugging me cuz that sort of music is just not my bag of cookies. (or box, depending on your brand of cookie preference). I'm more of a guitar type person. Even as a little one, I used to pretend I was strumming my guitar in my car seat (on the big black buckle thing in front of me...you remember those car seats?)in the car. I would strum it to whatever was playing on the radio. I didn't have radio station choice privledges-excuse spelling- at that point in time (as I'm sure you figured since I wasn't even big enough to sit in a regular seat). It was an oldies station that both of my parents listened to. So I could probably sing all those songs in my sleep (they were like the first songs I heard for the first 10 years of my life.. EVERYtime in the car. ) I remember especially liking the guitar to Simon and Garfunkel's "Mrs. Robinson" and that instrumental song called like "gas something" ....I forget the name of the song. Well, I'm gonna go now....Catchya all later

-Max

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On the lighter side :-) ........

So I could write some poetry now or some deep thought but....
Na........
So whats up?
You don't need to answer that if you don't want to-
Just making conversation.
If I were a frog, and you were my owner, what would you name me?
Would you keep me in your lunchbox?
Thats what I used to do when I was younger (no, not hop into other people's lunchboxes).
At camp in the summer, I used to have this hard lunchbox cooler things (remember those?) and
I would (after I ate my lunch out of it obviously), when I's see a little mini frog (they were all over the place at this camp), I'd put some grass in the lunch box and collected the frogs in there. At the end of the day, I would set them free though. It was actually tough to part with them (especially when I'd give them names).
Imagine if you'd live on a farm and raised and slaughtered chickens. And imagine if you had names for one of your chickens and then would slaughter them. " Honey! Come down! It's dinner time! We're eating Margret!"
Lol.
So now it's time for the (drumroll please)...........
Ingenius Thought of the Day
"Thought of the day." Huh. Has a nice ring to it (as if I made up the phrase ;-)
Although in my case, maybe I should have instead: "Question of the day" but then that would
limit me to a question a day and I don't think I can handle that kind of limit. Oh yeah, thought of the day right.
Hmmm.......
Did I think today?
Oh yeah! I just did! (the "hmmm")
Anyways, yeah.....
The ingenius thought for today is:
Nope.....cant think of anything......Lets turn it into the Question of the day
So, the Question for today is:
uch this is too hard. You're putting me on the spot here!
And by you, I mean me. Dont worry I only talk to myself on leap years.
So I'm gonna go and I just want to remind everyone to take their vitamins if they havent yet done so today
See ya soon!
-Max

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Note from me to you

So how much do you know about me?
Is what you know, what you see in my words on this blog?
Then what if I would change the way I write?
Would you see me differently?
Have you ever seen me one day, then the next and feel like you're experiencing two different people?
Yeah? Well, I'm sorry to hear that.
Now I guess you've gotta rethink if you've ever really met ME before
I guess we have to start over now then.
It's nice to meet you my name is ___________
This time try to see past some of the stuff that threw you off before.
You can do it. I know you can
I am ONE person.......I dare you to find me!

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The first subject we are going to address in this Undecided-aholic's Anonymous is indecision.
Oh, wait....Hi, my name is Max Imum and I'm an Undecided-aholic. Wow, that felt good to get off my chest. So anyway, back to the topic at hand:
Indecision
Why do we have to make decisions anyway? What is their purpose?
I mean, let's say I have to choose between Option A & Option B
So let's say I choose Option A. Now what? Whoopie...I chose Option A. No more Option B! Am I supposed to be jumping for joy because I've eliminated option B? I mean, what did Option B ever do to me that I should sing and dance at his/its defeat: "Ding dong the witch is dead..." Was Option B so horrible that its extinction calls for a party or something? Really, Option A isn't so much better. So does that mean I should eliminate him/it too? Then I can celebrate for killing off ALL options! Whoopee! Now I don't have to do ANYTHING! Option A is dead along with its sister (or brother) Option B!
Again, I return to my original question:
What is the purpose of making a decision?
I have posed my first question and I would like to know if anyone can give me any answers.
Looking forward.....
-Max

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New Support Group

I think I'm gonna start a support group and thanks to Elusive Twirl, I have a name for it
Undecided-aholic's Anonymous
I am the President. Joining this support group is absolutely free! All you have to do is comment and say that you want to join :-) (and that's not all! If you call within the next 5 minutes you can get your very own......just kidding......sorry, I couldn't resist the infomercial thing)
undecided-aholic's Anonymous is second cousins to "perfectionists anonymous" and "lack-of-directionaholic's anonymous"......so if you have a membership at any of those you may want to consider this one. :-)
P.S.: if you're having a hard time deciding if you want to join....then I'm sorry to hear that.....catch 22

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By the way

By the way my friends,
When you post, do not reveal my name
for that would defeat the purpose of this thingy
thanks man
-Max

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Maximum

Max is short for Maximum and not my name :-)

So the question of the night is:

How long is Silly Putty supposed to last before it turns funny colors?

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Welcome

Welcome to what appears to be an open forum of thought where

"The main thing is to make the main thing the main thing"

-unknown

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